I come to day seven in my new devotional and there is nothing to study on this day. The writer has designated the seventh day of study as God Encounters. My assignment is to review and reflect and even revel in the ways God has revealed himself to me these last six days.
I decided in a moment to skip it. Let's move forward. I am ready for the next lesson.
This transition in our lives brings me to tears at the strangest times. Yesterday was one of those days. No specific trigger or circumstance...just a momma missing her baby.
This morning the chair I sit in to study is covered in parts of a broken dryer and the repair man is coming. I grab my stuff and go to the kitchen ready to take on the next devo. With the flick of a finger my notebook lights up and there sits an encouragement from a sweet friend.
Isn't it marvelous how God knows just what you need. And what I need is a day of reveling. No word to study...no thoughts to consider...just take time to be. I often tell my friend I never look back at my journal entries...what's the point? We have to move forward, right?
Revel means to take intense pleasure or satisfaction in...even a wild celebration. Maybe this is the key to a day of strengthening.
And so I give thanks
...for a text from my oldest at just the right time
...a friend who leaves me a college mom basket right on my desk
...a mentor who listens through my tears and gives me wise advice
...a sister who walks with me in the late evening even though she is tired
...encouraging words from a sweet friend
Moving forward and growing is a seasonal thing. A cycle of learning, repenting, growing paired with times of reveling. Today I wildly celebrate the one who created this cycle and knows just what I need.
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
What's Your Name?
We cram in the elevator to see the dorm room for the first time. She stands behind us, the one helping us move in and smiles.
She asks my daughter, "What's your name?" She wants more than just the name. Is it short for something? Why this name? And then she nods and smiles and says she likes it.
Later that day as we finish up the moving, the meeting of a roommate, a trip to Target, and a last meal. I see her again. There she is, taller than most, standing in line for the elevator. She waves at my daughter and then turns to me and says,
"Hey Ronni's mom!"
Just two weeks ago I wanted to know what my name meant. Not the name this girl called me, Ronni's mom, but my name...the one given to me by my parents. There in the quiet I am prompted to search for the meaning. His gentle reminder of who He says that I am.
My pastor reminded me that this is a time of letting go and letting go is hard. Isn't that the journey of being someone's mom...a journey of letting go? It leaves a void at times...her being miles away and so I reach to Him. The one who inspired my name...knew I would need the definition today...reminding me of who I am.
Take a listen to this song I hear on the radio often. One that reminds me of who I was...of who He is growing me to be. What would you write on your name tag? Is it one that He uses to define you? Is it how He sees you? Are you stumped? Search out the meaning or your name...you might be surprised at what you find.
She asks my daughter, "What's your name?" She wants more than just the name. Is it short for something? Why this name? And then she nods and smiles and says she likes it.
Later that day as we finish up the moving, the meeting of a roommate, a trip to Target, and a last meal. I see her again. There she is, taller than most, standing in line for the elevator. She waves at my daughter and then turns to me and says,
"Hey Ronni's mom!"
Just two weeks ago I wanted to know what my name meant. Not the name this girl called me, Ronni's mom, but my name...the one given to me by my parents. There in the quiet I am prompted to search for the meaning. His gentle reminder of who He says that I am.
My pastor reminded me that this is a time of letting go and letting go is hard. Isn't that the journey of being someone's mom...a journey of letting go? It leaves a void at times...her being miles away and so I reach to Him. The one who inspired my name...knew I would need the definition today...reminding me of who I am.
Take a listen to this song I hear on the radio often. One that reminds me of who I was...of who He is growing me to be. What would you write on your name tag? Is it one that He uses to define you? Is it how He sees you? Are you stumped? Search out the meaning or your name...you might be surprised at what you find.
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
When words should be few...
Monday...the day for clarity and my friend who I call she asks if I have gotten any? The significance of that word didn't really hit me until later in the sanctuary. There in the quiet I read...
It is clear that I am to guard my steps...to listen rather than speak...to have few words about the matter.
This matter that has cropped up is divisive. Causing others to be tossed back and forth...leaving me feeling drained. And there are ones I deeply love on both sides of an issue that has left Jesus in the background.
Everything feels heavy around the office today...a weighted cloud settles around me and tears well. I close the door to shut out the sound of voices talking...distracting me from work. I flippantly turn on some music mainly to further drown out what is going on around my little space.
David Crowder has been waiting there to fill the air around me with a message. Won't you take a listen...
You can almost touch it...God's warmth floods the space around me. And God he shines...and I am put back on my feet. This is the place we must run to when His light becomes dim...hard to see. The dark is just an absence of light and we are called to "be the light of the world". So let's shine among those being tossed as if we are a light house on the shore. Not with words or theory or theology...nor scripture or opinions that can be used to tear and wound. No...let's keep our words few...and our light bright.
"Guard your steps as you go to the house of God and draw near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools; for they do not know they are doing evil. Do not be hasty in word or impulsive in thought to bring up a matter in the presence of God. For God is in heaven and you are on the earth; therefore let your words be few."--Ecc. 5
This matter that has cropped up is divisive. Causing others to be tossed back and forth...leaving me feeling drained. And there are ones I deeply love on both sides of an issue that has left Jesus in the background.
Everything feels heavy around the office today...a weighted cloud settles around me and tears well. I close the door to shut out the sound of voices talking...distracting me from work. I flippantly turn on some music mainly to further drown out what is going on around my little space.
David Crowder has been waiting there to fill the air around me with a message. Won't you take a listen...
You can almost touch it...God's warmth floods the space around me. And God he shines...and I am put back on my feet. This is the place we must run to when His light becomes dim...hard to see. The dark is just an absence of light and we are called to "be the light of the world". So let's shine among those being tossed as if we are a light house on the shore. Not with words or theory or theology...nor scripture or opinions that can be used to tear and wound. No...let's keep our words few...and our light bright.
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Until...
Little black words on the white screen read...what does until mean? The text from my friend brings me back to this word again. When I think about it I am amazed at the power in such a little word.
Webster's says until is a "function word". It indicates "continuance" for a specific time period. Yet God doesn't exist in time and his continuance has no beginning and no end.
Yesterday, the day to get a clear picture of my heart, revealed that which I had been trying to ignore.
Pride working its way back in...
My tongue getting in the way...
So this journey may continue a while with no specified time of completion. This seems hard..."until" gives me something to strive for...an ending to a hard thing.
Lately my friend and I we have been pushing ourselves during our exercise sessions. We run for short periods of time or distances. We stand at the top of the hill and decide to run to the next mailbox. We start and I begin to get tired...legs burning...lungs heaving. Just a few more steps...no stopping until....
When there is no finish line the race seems to go on forever. And this work that Jesus does in us, it does go on forever. And we must press on to win the race.
"Do you not know that in a race all runners run but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize."--1 Cor. 9:24
Monday, July 8, 2013
Until...
There it is...in the quiet as I finish my study this morning...the call to return to this place. There is struggle with the thought of returning to this discipline. I think of all the difficulty in the spiritual discipline of fasting...the sacrifice...the obedience...the constancy of it. My flesh doesn't want to go. I have come up with a hundred excuses to put it off.
"How long Lord?"
If I have a set amount of time maybe then it will not seem so hard.
I hear the word "until" and I wonder "until what?"
This word it bounces around in my thoughts. The more I whisper this word the greater the potential of it all becomes.
And so...I begin and will continue...until.
"How long Lord?"
If I have a set amount of time maybe then it will not seem so hard.
I hear the word "until" and I wonder "until what?"
This word it bounces around in my thoughts. The more I whisper this word the greater the potential of it all becomes.
And so...I begin and will continue...until.
Monday, April 29, 2013
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Chaos Abounding
All around it seems chaos is abounding...things happening and changing at rapid speeds...and last week was too much.
...news of a leadership change, bombs going off, senior night, a letter saying no to that which we were hoping for, explosions in West, terrorists captured...
The rubble of these things just seems to be laying around. We look and wonder what to do with this mess. In the aftermath of chaos I usually get to work. My hands must do something...anything. I spent the weekend finishing a few tasks and restoring order to places in the house that chaos has touched.
After chaos and the rubble is removed and things are put back in place. After it looks as if it never happened, houses are rebuilt, blood on a boat is wiped away, and denials are accepted...what then? My friend he wrote on facebook that our country used to feel safe and now it doesn't. Yes, we can sweep the streets and mend bodies but what about our hearts?
Sometimes the things that happened in the scriptures seem so far away. Yesterday's sermon reminded me of how timeless His Word is. There is Jesus sitting on the mountain with crowds surrounding him. He has spent countless hours healing the sick, giving freedom to those consumed, holding babies and feeding thousands. He has cleaned up the rubble in their lives and taken care of those that need immediate relief. Yet, they still remain...hanging around...following him. Why? What more do they want? After your illness is healed, why not go back home to your normal life?
I am certain that someone in that crowd was like me. Nine times Jesus says the word "blessed". Blessed and the poor in spirit, those who mourn, the meek and the peacemakers, the hungry and the merciful. This is how He began his teaching...by reminding them that even amidst the chaos and rubble...they are blessed.
I have spent the last few months hiding these words in my heart...memorizing these very words of blessings. Painting a door chalkboard black is my response to the chaos...the not knowing what is coming next. The words read bright on the door.
"Now faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see."--Hebrews 11:1
Faith is a now response to the past, present and future. The rubble becomes building blocks that God uses to build our faith and trust in Him. By faith we call ourselves blessed...in the middle of the chaos...and the rubble...we are blessed.
...news of a leadership change, bombs going off, senior night, a letter saying no to that which we were hoping for, explosions in West, terrorists captured...
The rubble of these things just seems to be laying around. We look and wonder what to do with this mess. In the aftermath of chaos I usually get to work. My hands must do something...anything. I spent the weekend finishing a few tasks and restoring order to places in the house that chaos has touched.
After chaos and the rubble is removed and things are put back in place. After it looks as if it never happened, houses are rebuilt, blood on a boat is wiped away, and denials are accepted...what then? My friend he wrote on facebook that our country used to feel safe and now it doesn't. Yes, we can sweep the streets and mend bodies but what about our hearts?
Sometimes the things that happened in the scriptures seem so far away. Yesterday's sermon reminded me of how timeless His Word is. There is Jesus sitting on the mountain with crowds surrounding him. He has spent countless hours healing the sick, giving freedom to those consumed, holding babies and feeding thousands. He has cleaned up the rubble in their lives and taken care of those that need immediate relief. Yet, they still remain...hanging around...following him. Why? What more do they want? After your illness is healed, why not go back home to your normal life?
I am certain that someone in that crowd was like me. Nine times Jesus says the word "blessed". Blessed and the poor in spirit, those who mourn, the meek and the peacemakers, the hungry and the merciful. This is how He began his teaching...by reminding them that even amidst the chaos and rubble...they are blessed.
I have spent the last few months hiding these words in my heart...memorizing these very words of blessings. Painting a door chalkboard black is my response to the chaos...the not knowing what is coming next. The words read bright on the door.
"Now faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see."--Hebrews 11:1
Faith is a now response to the past, present and future. The rubble becomes building blocks that God uses to build our faith and trust in Him. By faith we call ourselves blessed...in the middle of the chaos...and the rubble...we are blessed.
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